Listen.
You know when a black woman starts with "Listen" and ends with a period she has a strong point to make. Haha (Thanx Kev on Stage for that recent post on this. www.instagram.com/p/CDwUidDHh-f/) This has been a day of high highs and low lows. Basically, I'm 2020, as Kendrick Sampson put it recently in a widely shared IG post among my peers (https://www.instagram.com/p/CDuPaiuBIxf/). Par for the course, you know. But I am feeling like I can do anything right now. That I have all the time in the world. My growth mentality and my LIT AF life philosophy and practice of Buddhism has me believing that the impossible in most certainly possible. Let's take it back. Yesterday, two of my friends confessed via instagram posts that they had to let the tears flow. 2020 has been a bitch and it's not letting up. Two friends of my husband are in the depths of depression and out of no where gave 30 days notice to their landlord. They're leaving CA to go live with a relative that they already know is going to be problematic. Both of them freelance in TV production. There's no work. Another friend text me that she is climbing out of rough few days. When I asked if it was work of life related and that I was there to talk, her response was, "I'll just say it is challenging being a newly wed during a pandemic." I am just now realizing that even if she wanted to talk, it would be difficult... cuz obvi, they're stuck in the same place together. Maaannn. Children are going back to school and the whole school goes into quarantine. Teachers are having to change their wills. 45's man is making cuts to the post office and vote-by-mail is being threatened. Voter suppression, anyone? 45 might need a mandate to leave the White House. And I can't exclude myself from this. On the way to the grocery store this afternoon, I was all kinds of gasp, cry, sniffle, repeat underneath my mask about the deeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep pain that my people have faced in this county since we first stepped foot here. Heart palpitations today. Too much suffering. We need reparations. Tell your congress rep to support H.R. 40 - it's literally just a commission to study and develop reparation proposals! (Learn more here) But I digress. Not really. All this is relevant! Here's the silver lining: I just got off of an encouragement call with the national arts department of SGI - my buddhist organization - and my faith is restored. I am determining that I will be part of a new renaissance! I am determining that in the next 10 years of my life that the words that I write, that the roles that I play, that the worlds that I help build through my art will be part of a renaissance that transforms society. And that that work will sustain and enrich my life in these specific ways: (1) I will make at least 4x as much money as I did in 2019, in each consecutive year from the first, and (2) my company will be synonymous with value-creation in my field by creating plentiful opportunities and being a platform for voices that deserve to be amplified. I am so excited! Because now I have a specific goal, with a specific time frame and with a solid and sustainable mission. Now all I have to do is unite with my spiritual mentor with courageous action! Wayne Shorter, the Jazz saxophonist and composer, at 87 years young says, "My life is in a state of zero gravity." In other words, he's still moving forward. He's defying anything attempting to keep him locked in stagnation. Here, here! I am choosing to look at this time of 2020 as a profound opportunity to cultivate resilience, wisdom, deep compassion, and tenacious courage to Never. Stop. Moving. Forward. And to buttress this phenomenal tower of ambition, I always go back to something Ava Duvernay once said, "If your dream is only about you, it's not big enough." What if we think of 2020 like a windup toy? Every month, every challenge, every action is just the winding key being rotated - potential energy being stored up, and once the key is released, that energy is changed into motion! Let's GOOOOO! Lastly, KAMALA HARRIS!!! enisha b. janeIn my own words.
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March 2023
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